A lot of my elderly relatives and my mother don’t like it when I write controversial posts. So I was laying low for the last two days even after an infamous incident happened in Kerala, India. The context of that incident was right up my alley but I chose to stay quiet because I didn’t want that man getting any more attention. He’s not worth it and there are no two ways about it. But I also commend the women who did not wait for anyone to stand up for them and hit this man black and blue! I wish I had the courage to speak up and do that when a man was taking the pleasure of rubbing his privates against me in a crowded b
us. I told this incident to my friend and she introduced me to the idea that has been used since ages by girls and women using public transportation. It’s holding a safety pin in your hand to protect yourself from all the men standing or coming anywhere close to us. I remember feeling it was my mistake that I had been unaware of these situations and that this is the norm in India.
My situation was nowhere as ghastly as what this man did. Even without touching them he spoke so lowly of two women who he claims as feminist prostitutes! When I saw the first few minutes of his video, I dismissed it as some low scum trying to garner attention. Then a lot of discussions happened about it in Whatsapp groups that I’m part of. So I went back and watched the whole video. The reaction in these WhatsApp groups were divided and I felt happy to see some of the men lauding this action. There were also men who said that man deserved it but this was not the right way to react. They should have officially lodged a police complaint. That’s their point of view and they have a right to it. I didn’t react there either.
Fast forward to today morning and I read the news of Hathras and Balrampur gang rapes. What caught my attention was a former Supreme Court judge’s comment about these incidents. He said he condemns rapes and doesn’t endorse it but, the country must also consider the fact that during this Corona situation so many men are losing jobs and men have the natural urge for sex so they have no other go but rape.
Well, I had thought commenting in the WhatsApp groups didn’t make sense because those people are either not educated much or are just plainly born and raised with a closed mentality. But if a former Supreme Court judge who has so much education and who is trained to look at any situation unbiased, talks like this, there’s something really wrong with that country!
I despise the patriarchy of a country where men are applauded and called heroes for striking at someone who talks against him or his family but if women do the same they are called “thugs”! I shun the patriarchy of a country that finds rape as a natural consequence of the sexual urge in men and a result of unemployment.
One rape is reported every 15 minutes in India yet the conviction rate is as low as 32.2%. I have read somewhere that even animals understand consent then why not these men? I am not generalizing men here, I have known and still know a lot of respectable men in my life, family and friends. But all the men who felt that the man in Kerala shouldn’t have been manhandled and this former Supreme Court judge who said that it’s not a man’s fault to have sexual urges, would they still have the same opinion if their wives or daughters are verbally attacked and called a prostitute or even worse some girl or woman in their family is raped?
This is the irony of the state of our country. All I can say is smash patriarchy and raise educated and informed sons. Teach them the importance of consent and don’t raise them as entitled men!